(2/5) Echoes of Her Shadows: Looking Around

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3 min read

With much of ample efforts, Tanvi chose to express her battle with depression with the world.

While the names in this series would be fictional to protect privacy. The narrative would be in her own words & inspired by our discussions.

Notes in her own words:

I believe that, when emotions are suppressed or ignored, they intensify. The more you try to disregard them, the stronger their grip becomes. You might think you're in control, but in reality, it's quite the opposite. They escalate at a rate that becomes unmanageable.

In situations like these, people judge too quickly and easily. You can cry in front of them a few times, but not always, right? After a while, the person might get irritated with you. And it's not like crying once or twice will solve everything permanently!

Deciding whom to talk to, whom not to or in front of whom to cry? Most people have a set of friends, siblings or a significant other. But what about those who don't? Or those who feel too insecure to share? Where should they go?

Often motivational speakers emphasize moving on and forgetting past issues, which can seem dismissive. It's like they're telling us to ignore our feelings rather than address them. Instead of releasing feelings, I prefer holding onto them more tightly to understand the patterns they create in our bodies and minds.

This approach can be enlightening because it helps us realize how these feelings operate subconsciously. We should be present with them, no matter how challenging it may seem.

I understand I’m expressing a sense of frustration about finding solutions that may not always work out, and wondering about what happens if they fail.

I’m wondering, why no one talks about the potential failure and the consequences of continually searching for a solution, which might cause someone to lose vital parts of herself in the process.

I’m also reflecting on the possibility of this process being prolonged and whether the effort and understanding will be reciprocated by others.

Additionally, you feel perhaps you're too young to be so concerned or philosophical about these unresolved issues, even though others suggest there's much more of the world for me to experience.

Yet, you can't help but be troubled by these unresolved questions that linger on. Is there anything specific within this scenario that you're seeking advice on or perhaps a different perspective to consider?

While our minds might believe that clinging to certain thoughts keeps us happy, it often leads to exhaustion from the tension it creates. Recognizing this can lead us to a point of softening and healing.

It's important to allow ourselves to fully experience our emotions, as each one plays a crucial role in our overall well-being. You're right to think deeply about this sometimes, the path less traveled offers profound insights.

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As the old saying goes, it costs nothing to be kind to others!

I'd add that being harsh or rude also costs nothing—it's just two sides of the same coin. Ultimately, it's up to you to decide whether you want to be benevolent or malevolent to the persons dwelling under suffering.

To convey how they feel, one must show signs to the other person. Crying alone in a room or over messages won't let others understand what one is going through.

This series needs to be treated as the reflection of someone's personal journey, not as any medical advice on mental health or depression.